Tuesday, April 21, 2009


Welcome those from ICLW! I'm noticing people doing an intro post and thought I should do that, especially since what I posted last night is a bit heavy and sad.
My husband Zar and I have had two children, Charlotte and Ella. While pregnant with Charlotte we saw some funny stuff on ultrasound and eventually she was diagnosed with partial trisomy 16, partial monosomy 9. We did not expect her to live to term but she did and lived for more than 3 years. She was incredible and sweet and beautiful. She passed away two months ago today from a common respiratory virus, RSV.
Ella was born last October. She was a surprise pregnancy and we tried a CVS to find out if she is a carrier of the condition that led to Charlotte's diagnosis. The test failed but she looked fine on ultrasound, and I felt good about her health. We still don't know her carrier status but she is beautiful, healthy and has saved our sanity since we lost Charlotte.
We are currently looking into IVF with pre-diagnosis done on the embryos. I don't feel comfortable just trying for another child and hoping it turns out okay, and since knowing Charlotte I could never terminate a pregnancy that may turn out like her. We are waiting to find out what percentage of Zar's swimmers are normal or balanced compared to unbalanced. We are also open to adoption. We are excited but very nervous.
We are just learning to adjust to our new status as a "normal" family without a special needs child. It's hard and strange and we want our sweet girl back. I don't know what we would do without Ella. I am still grieving pretty hard but thank goodness for good friends, family and faith. Just taking it a day at a time. Oh and please excuse the above picture, I'd just given birth. Sorta. Surgically, rather.

11 comments:

heyLyss09 said...

Hello and happy ICLW! I'm glad to have found your blog and feel honored to get to read about your beautiful children.

Alyssa

Becky said...

You are beautiful Erin...inside and out! We are pulling for you and can't wait to see your family continue to grow!

Marianne said...

Hi Erin. I don't know if you remember me... My name is Marianne Hurst, we were friends when we were kids. Our fathers are colleagues (Scott Hurst, MD). My mom told me about sweet Charlotte. I'm happy to have found you and your blog and just wanted you to know that you’re in my thoughts and prayers.

Michelle said...

Erin-

Thanks so much for the sweet card and picture of Charlotte. Hopefully we can meet soon! I keep telling Amanda we need to do something together :)

We have Angel Wings said...

(((HUGS)))

The Captain's Wife said...

Thank you for the intro, you sound like such a very strong and wise woman. We should all feel blessed to have you writing so that we can gain additional strength through you.

I have just become a mother for the 1st time this February and can not imagine the heart ache you have been through. Both of your babies are simply beautiful. Best wishes on adding another heart to your home~

ICLW

skrambled said...

Hi Erin,
Thanks for the comment on my blog.
My heart aches for you. I am so sorry that you had to endure something like this. ICLW

Heather said...

What a beautiful picture. :)

I am so sorry to learn about Charlotte's passing. What an unbearable heartache to face. My prayers are with you.

Spliz said...

what is iclw?

Scrambled Egg said...

Thank you for sharing your story, and I am so sorry for the loss of your sweet girl. Hugs.

Jill said...

My heart breaks for you for losing your beautiful little girl. You seem like such a strong, beautiful person. Sending lots of hugs and support.

iclw