Sunday, January 29, 2006

Before she got at the bottle:
Don't pretend you never woke up in a pink leopard print onesie, a feather lined sweater and an empty bottle in one hand. Don't judge Charlotte just because she's a booze-hound.

Sunday, January 22, 2006

Jealous
I'm jealous of our neighbors and their top floor condo with red walls and vaulted ceilings. I come home from playing scabble and eating pistachios and our place seems like a cave. A cave with a giant bean bag on the floor, baby toys and a low ceiling. It's gross. There is a lot of crumbs and dried pasta and baby formula under the microwave and I refuse to clean it up. We let the cat destroy the arms of our couch so not only does it look like something from a swamp, but it is curiously fuzzy. The ceiling fan doesn't work. The carpet is matted. The pictures on the wall are not hung expertly in clever, pleasing formations, despite my yearbook editor experience. The coffee table is still against the wall in in our bedroom. My scrapbook stuff is in a plastic rainbow rolling cart in the MAIN ROOM. There is a chair against the fridge to keep it closed. I HATE IT!
I want a new couch, the green one that wraps around from Costco. I want an electrician to fix the fan. Kristen says "you should see my "CRAFT ROOM!" CRAFT ROOM!!!?? I have a ROLLING RAINBOW CART! I want a fridge that stays closed on its own. I want a maid.
Mostly, I want a house. A small house, with ample closet space, and a craft room. Zar says "lets be out of here in three years." Three years? I will be 28. I should be rich by then, living in a $400,000 home with a hot tub, right? how is that possibly going to happen? I just spent almost $200 on sugar free cookies and strained peas! I almost bought a "diamondique" ring off QVC today! I am not a saver.
I want a couch. And a house. And red walls and ceiling fan that...fans.
But I still want sugar free cookies and dinners out and whatever other crap I buy that eats at my paycheck. I wish Zar was independently wealthy. And would let me hire a maid.

Sunday, January 15, 2006

Life's pretty decent on the Beach
I am rapidly approaching the end of Phase 1 of the South Beach Diet. Unfortunately I am not rapidly approaching my goal weight. Shame. All those beans for so little.
I have always, ALWAYS wanted to lose a few pounds. Now I look back at pre-pregnancy days and think "wow, what a hot young bod." And so underappreciated! Oh well, I still fit in those clothes, they are just uncomfy now. But here is what I miss that is Body Related:
time to go to the gym every day and trot on a treadmill watching CNN and listening to "The Middle" over and over.
When my belly pooch was smaller and did not have stretch marks.
Buying Gym Clothes and Self Magazine
My attitude that life without rasinettes and gummy items was not worth living.
Buying a new swimsuit every January to push myself to workout although I've never had Swimsuit Body by any means.
And right now, bread--soft chewy, delicious bread.

Oh well. I tell myself I'll never be obese. But I will always be just a little bit fat, to quote Briget Jones. And I will always be Charlotte's mom. And I will always be Zar's wife and the boss of my household. And I will always be in love with mountains and big dogs and earrings and raisinettes. So I can let the stretch marks go.